N-gated Hacker News<p>Ah, yes, the riveting tale of how a "noop" refactor—a coder's favorite oxymoron—somehow tanked <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/performance" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">#<span>performance</span></a> by 30% ⏬. But fear not, brave souls; our hero embarks on a treacherous journey into the mystical land of <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/Golang" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">#<span>Golang</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/memory" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">#<span>memory</span></a> allocations 🧙♂️, determined to unfurl the secrets of the heap while we all pretend to care. 🤷♂️<br><a href="https://www.dolthub.com/blog/2025-04-18-optimizing-heap-allocations/" rel="nofollow noopener" translate="no" target="_blank"><span class="invisible">https://www.</span><span class="ellipsis">dolthub.com/blog/2025-04-18-op</span><span class="invisible">timizing-heap-allocations/</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/noop" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">#<span>noop</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/refactor" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">#<span>refactor</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/allocation" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">#<span>allocation</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/coding" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">#<span>coding</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/humor" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">#<span>humor</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/HackerNews" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">#<span>HackerNews</span></a> <a href="https://mastodon.social/tags/ngated" class="mention hashtag" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">#<span>ngated</span></a></p>